No longer content with getting their sex education through Carry On films and television shows such as Benny Hill, the British Government is set to introduce the topic into kindergartens. With one of the highest teen pregnancy rates in Europe, Britain's national curriculum is about to get a shake-up. It's not about teaching five year olds about sex, says Schools Minister Jim Knight, it's about helping them to "know themselves, their differences, their friendships and how to manage their feelings". He says lessons would get more "sophisticated" as children get older and new topics would be covered.
Feedback from parents has been mixed. Some say it should be up to them to decide when the word "penis" is introduced into their five-year-old's vocabulary.
But with news this week that the "sex talk" isn't happening in 20 per cent of Australian homes, surely the British Government's move can be nothing but a good thing, perhaps one that we should look at replicating here.
My daughter's in Year 1 and I'm pretty sure there's been nothing in her curriculum that could be defined as "sex education". Would I be ready for it if there was? She was sitting at the kitchen bench doing her homework the other week and talking to her brother and the I picked up on the words "sex me up". What does that mean? I asked her and she explained that it was when a boy and a girl rubbed up against each other. Who told you about that? I asked, knowing full well who it was. (There's one in every class.) And as we do when things such as this crop up we said this sort of talk is not appropriate for a seven year old.
But what is these days (without wanting to sound like my mother) when they're mimicing the gyrations of the Pussycat Dolls and singing the lyrics "when I grow up I want to have boobies" and don't even get me started on Bratz dolls.
Is it time for me to have the "sex talk"? I can't really remember having one with my mother but I'm sure we did at some point. I do remember going to an information night, at primary school, where we learned about certain things like getting your periods and pubic hair. It was the late 1970s and things have certainly changed since then. Would those delightful little books Where Did I Come From? and What's Happening to Me? have any place in today's society? (Remember the little boy on the diving board with the erection? I spent countless summers at the pool looking for him.)
At high school we had PD lessons (which we all called VD lessons), and one year one of the science teachers had our class and it was great fun. We'd do all sorts of experiments and hands on sorts of things. Well not quite that hands on but I do remember the boys blowing up condoms to see how big they could go and me explaining to our principal that I was out of class because I had to wash the spermicide off the applicator. I can still remember his face.
I can still remember the scene too in Monty Python's Meaning of Life (a film which should be compulsory in all PD lessons) when John Cleese brought in his wife to demonstrate a certain lesson. "What's wrong with a good kiss, Jenkins?"
So, yes, there probably is a place for a good bit of schoolyard education, whether it be Bratz or John Cleese or magazines borrowed from elder brothers. It's been that way, you'd think, since the first young viral cavemen first ducked off behind the cave to talk about the best cavewoman clubbing techniques.
But there has to be a place for some formalised sort of sex education. I don't know if I'm ready to give that talk on my own.