Jews, in case you missed that bit in your religious studies, don't celebrate the birth of Christ. Or the death of Christ. Or Christ in general. My parents were Holocaust survivors and were fairly anxious talking about their religion in public. Australians were not anti-Semitic in an organised way but my parents were not going to take any chances. We three children went to private religious schools but the religion was not our religion and, in those days, you didn't get the chance to do something useful, like sit outside and read.

No, you got to sit through endless droning about what the Bible meant. Yet, when you paid attention and came top of the scripture class, you didn't get to have the prize. When I say you, I mean me. I was pretty good at regurgitating Bible verses but that lovely embossed New Testament went to the girl who wore a pretty little cross with a sapphire at its centre around her neck. She came second by a long shot.

But once I married into a Catholic family, any reservations I had about celebrating Christmas went out the window. That's because I realised it was about something much more important than the birth of Jesus.

It was about celebrating your family. And that's why I will always love it. It's actually the one day of the year that has, from an official perspective, space put aside to be with people you love. They don't necessarily have to be people to whom you are related but, if you are fortunate, they are people to whom you will want to give time and energy.

That bit of it gets a little washed away in the mayhem of Christmas celebration. So frantic looking for the right gift, the right time, the right food, enough money, that the bit we are supposed to celebrate hardly feels like something we want to celebrate.

Here's one thing I love about Christmas Day now - our children are adults. My frantic insistence that we pretended Santa Claus existed meant many Christmas Eves up until nearly dawn, wrapping things at the last minute, nibbling at the carrots put our for the reindeer, drinking warm milk, leaving reindeer prints.

We now spend much more time preparing and cooking food we can share as adults - it feels less financially stressful to do that than to secrete away bicycles and Lego. Any gift we give each other is something we have had pleasure in discussing - and just a slight bit of teasing. We cook together, we tidy up together. And then everyone goes home to their own beds until Boxing Day, when we flop in front of the cricket eating leftovers with whomsoever wants to spend their day that way.

But there are small things I still forget to do and list them here so you won't. I never remember to turn the fridge to its lowest possible temperature in time for the first opening of the day, about 5am. This means that nothing gets cold or stays cold. So please, go to your fridge right now and use the knobs for both the fridge and the freezer. Those who eat your ice-cream and custard will thank me.

There is always someone I've left off the Christmas gift list. An aunt who doesn't normally come. A new partner. An old partner who is suddenly making a reappearance after all the Family Court things have settled down. My newest strategy for this is to buy several vouchers at my favourite book shop with card signed, ready to go. I've done this twice in the last few years. Takes the gift stress right out and, if you don't use them, it's a little apres Christmas treat for you.

The person who was meant to bring the salad/fruit/chocolate/coffee/bread/meat/fish forgets. Or is late. Our newest tactic for this is to spread the load. So, not just one person in charge of any of those categories. Works a treat.

I asked tweeters for advice but some are too hard for me to do. I can't shop in August for December. But we have learnt to share and delegate. One of my favourite people with whom I tweet, I only know her as SpaceKidette, says we should buy non-perishable items as extras, starting in August. That's a genius idea and one I'll try next time. That will save me looking in three different supermarkets for currants in December. Also, how does the bottle shop not have half bottles of brandy right now? No, I do not want to spend $40 on a whole bottle. That will not end well.

Plus, sticky tape. Wrapping paper. A pot large enough to boil the pudding. Paper napkins.

I can't tell you to enjoy yourselves because, for years, I was too stressed to do just that. By the time Christmas morning came, I was as overexcited as the children. And that never ended well, until now.

Now, it's my favourite day of the year with or without the New Testament.

Twitter @jennaprice or email jenna_p@bigpond.net.au