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Date: May 05 2012
Is there a support group for people who had not anticipated the lonely guilty void that would be left after the series finale of Revenge? What a glorious load of nonsense. Come back Emily, you karate-chopping, Japanese-fluent, Assangesque hacker, hot chick with an eye for a rich boy and a stomach for violent, bloody endings. The unsettling story of love and hate in the Hamptons captured our hearts and a bucket load of ratings.
A lot of other big guns are on offer. Mostly crap, but not glossy crap of the magnificent calibre of Revenge. Viewers looking for a new love are going to have to commit to The Block, or MasterChef, or Dancing with the Stars, or the singing contests. It's not that Todd McKenney or Matt Preston aren't capable of capturing us in their thrall, it's just that after a serious break-up, like the one we've all just endured with Revenge, the viewer can feel a little delicate. George Calombaris and another dodgy risotto can be too much.
I like to watch Kerri-Anne Kennerley fall flat on her face as much as the next girl, but there are too many sequins and bugle beads on DWTS. Parts of Mel B appear to be trying to escape from her dresses. It's unseemly.
By contrast, the mud, dust and tool belts of The Block (Nine, Sunday, 6.30pm; Monday-Friday, 7pm), along with Scotty Cam's overly cheerful-as-a-cricket demeanour, make The Block slightly depressing, yet strangely saccharine, all at once. Competitive young builders would make better choices in window dressing after a steak and a long Epsom-salts bath.
These loud and colourful mega shows are not your only options. There's a parallel universe, a road less travelled for those feeling a little overwhelmed by the ratings juggernauts. It's a little place I like to call the ABC.
Aunty is serving up a smorgasbord of programs that definitely deserve your consideration, if not your Revenge-style addiction.
Feeling a little wrung out, shy or timid? It's reassuring to know that nobody at the ABC is going to hit you over the head with commercial personality. Sure, Costa Georgiadis is an unusual guy, but Gardening Australia is nowhere near as confronting as The Block. Hosts such as Daniel MacPherson and Grant Denyer flash those dazzling choppers and whip out speedy repartee with judges and contestants but you have to feel strong to sit for hours in their company. (Does every episode go forever, or does it just feel that way?)
By contrast, the quieter, gentler stylings of William McInnes at Auction Room (Sunday, ABC1, 6pm) have a soothing, settling effect, like a thermos of soup in the rain. McInnes is inclusive and wry. He makes me feel brainy. On Two on the Great Divide (ABC1, Sunday, 7.30pm), Tim Flannery and John Doyle are obviously much more brainy than anybody in my house. They know a lot about everything and are not overly smug in the way they share this information, but when they get a little earnest I find myself rushing back into the arms of Scotty Cam, or heaven forbid, Mel B.
Every ABC viewer will find comfort and company in Andrew Denton's return to television. Randling (ABC1, Wednesday, 8.30pm) follows The Gruen Transfer's tradition of picking an obscure, previously meaningless title and making it stick. Randling is a fun contest of word games for brainy, articulate people who were never in the same maths or Latin class as anybody on The Voice or The Block. Less known, less obvious personalities such as the sparkling Annabel Crabb lend an adorable easy appeal to a group of people who can still spell ''Peloponnesian'' when they are pissed.
If Randling provides a haven for viewers hiding from the sequined spotlight, then Agony Aunts (ABC1, Wednesday, 9.30pm) is a flash resort. Adam Zwar's quest to make sense of sex and the differences between men and women continues with the women's frank and funny observations. We have a special knack when it comes to celebrating our menfolk. Judith Lucy, Julia Zemiro, Myf Warhurst and Mirka Mora are just a few of the insightful, self-deprecating, genuinely attractive girls who come clean on the subject.
This is an entirely successful escape from the big time. It's not Revenge, but then, what is?
Prophets of Science Fiction
SBS One, Sunday, 8.30pm
Arthur C. Clarke is the focus of this episode in the eight-part series. Not just for Trekkies and Jedi.
Shintaro!
SBS One, Saturday, 11pm
Even Phantom Agents diehards will enjoy this sword-wielding walk down memory lane.
Great Music Cities
MAX, Thursday, 9.30pm
Patchy but still fascinating series for music fans.
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