Free-to-air TV: Tuesday, February 26
Mike Sorrentino, aka "The Situation" in MTV's now axed show Jersey Shore, will appear on The Choice.
The Choice, Channel Eleven, 8.30pm
DATING shows are rarely classy affairs, but this mash-up of The Voice and Perfect Match, featuring showbiz people so down on their luck they're happy to take part in several bouts of cheap sleaze just so the word ''celebrity'' can precede their name, takes the concept to a new low. America's favourite British reality host, cheeky, cheesy Cat Deeley (So You Think You Can Dance), is charged with the unenviable task of pimping women dressed like hookers to four ''eligible bachelors'', who tonight are Mike ''the Situation'' Sorrentino (Jersey Shore), American Idol winner Taylor Hicks, retired American football player Warren Sapp, and TV chef Rocco DiSpirito. As if expressing their desperation for someone whose 15 minutes of fame has well and truly passed is not degrading enough, the women are evaluated on their physical attributes and ethnicity, with one white bachelor going so far as to declare his desire to ''try some chocolate''. Occasionally, the format switches gender. If the episodes are in order, next week's ''bachelorettes'' include Sophie Monk.
Parenthood, Channel Seven, 9.45pm
SUPERMUM facades are cracking all over the place in this tear-jerker of a modern-family series. Just as Julia (Erika Christensen) is primed to become a partner in the hot-shot law firm she works for, she finds herself struggling to fry eggs and ignore her daughter's disappointment that mummy missed the school dance recital. While Julia grapples with the working mothers' conundrum, Kristina (Monica Potter) braces herself for her children's reaction to her own dreadful news. Meanwhile, Sarah (Lauren Graham) navigates a sticky situation with her new colleague (played by Ray Romano in a concerted, yet not entirely successful, attempt to throw off his character from Everybody Loves Raymond). The improvisational dialogue and underplayed drama that facilitate this series' natural flow give way to a stirring Hollywood ending, when the clan gathers to witness the healing powers of baseball.
Sun, Sex and Suspicious Parents, GO!, 8.30pm
DESPITE the best efforts of the makers of this British tabloid-style documentary to provoke all-out war between parents and their barely legal offspring, the opposite is, surprisingly, often the result. Having agreed to be filmed secretly watching their children acquainting themselves with the youthful pleasures of drinking, dancing, spewing and getting their bits out in the nightclub districts of impoverished European nations, it's fair to assume the snoopers will be ropeable by the time the big reveal trots around. While there is a fair amount of shock and dismay on the parents' faces, they're mostly just relieved that their children are still alive, and swiftly join them in tall, elaborately garnished drinks to celebrate. It's unlikely such exposure of what is a fairly common rite of passage for generations of youngsters will deter any would-be schoolies week lushes, given it's all treated as a bit of a laugh that turns out mostly all right in the end. However, the fact these drunken antics best kept as hazy memories are broadcast internationally and will remain on the record in gory close-up forever should make a few think twice about what they put on Facebook.
Misfits: season finale, ABC2, 9.30pm
THE experiences of this group of young British criminals fulfilling their obligations to community service should be enough to deter the most casual of shoplifters. Missing penises, curious nuns and the terrifying ''Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse'' are part of a day's unpaid work for these offenders trapped between reality and supernatural madness. The acting is superb and the production values are impressive, but the transitions to fantasy seem to come as an unpleasant surprise. Tonight's double episode charges towards a typically confounding conclusion.