Blunt Instrument

A shameful week to be a man

Nigella Lawson allegedly choked by husband (Thumbnail)

John Birmingham Mostly I dig being a man. It’s awesome. And being a middle class white man? Holy crap. I don’t need to buy a lottery ticket because I won all the things just by turning up. But sometimes .

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Birmingham facing shaven-legged archer attack

Orlando Bloom as Legolas in Lord of the Rings.

John Birmingham Retrenched workers deserve compassion, not a kick in the guts.

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Retrenched workers deserve compassion, not a kick in the guts

BlueScope Steel in Hastings shed about 250 jobs in August.

John Birmingham Retrenched workers deserve compassion, not a kick in the guts.

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ALP's inevitable doom all of its own making

rudd

John Birmingham The ALP's inevitable doom is all of its own making.

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Can the space–time continuum handle a female Doctor Who?

DOCTOR WHO SERIES 7B PREVIEW IMAGES ABC1 program, Dr Who with Matt Smith as The Doctor. Image supplied by ABC TV publicity.

John Birmingham Can the space–time continuum handle a female Dr Who?

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Greedy hippies have stolen all the electrons

peace sign hippy

John Birmingham Remember how all those politicians, both Labor and Liberal, promised – cross their hearts and hope to die – that electricity privatisation would lead to massive efficiencies and much ...

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Democracy up for sale if we don't pay

sale

John Birmingham Are you complete idiots? Do you know how much it costs to run an election campaign these days? And they have to be run, you know.

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Time to fire up the BBQ

Beef rib, Stokehouse style.

John Birmingham It’s a mystery. We should be a nation obsessed with the barbecue arts, but we are not. Oh, I’ll concede, we do grill. We’re not completely unfamiliar with the idea of ...

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Speedos in the Lodge, then what?

tony abbott

John Birmingham Our future under lies the reign of the Speedo King. What are you expecting?

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Racism is no black and white issue

fence neighbour

John Birmingham Australia is one of the world's least racist countries. Don’t hand out the cigars yet, though

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Shame bath people, shame

Shower

John Birmingham “Women use the bathtub to escape,” said Cate. “Like men use the toilet.”

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Freetard free-for-all just cause Foxtel won't compete

Game of Thrones Season 3 - Trailer (Thumbnail)

John Birmingham So, Foxtel has a put a bullet into the deal that let Australian viewers buy Game of Thrones, and other premium HBO series, episode by episode as they aired. No Foxtel, nooooo…

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The terrifying true story of 'man flu'

flu influenza common cold sick illness

John Birmingham Women of calibre my hairy male arse. They’re all sniffling malingers. And scientists have proven it with science. Man flu science. And they were male scientists, too, of course. The lady ...

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White paper whites out some inconvenient truths

Prime Minister Julia Gillard announced the 2013 Defence White Paper with Defence Minister Stephen Smith at Defence Establishment Fairbairn in Canberra on 3 May 2013. Photo: Andrew Meares

John Birmingham It’s tempting to wonder why Julia Gillard bothered expending time and political capital on last week’s Defence White Paper. It’s a policy area she neither cares nor knows much ...

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John Birmingham

Judgment day for everything icky

Demonstrators protest against same-sex marriages 03 March, 2004 in Portland, Oregon. A US gay-marriage revolution spread further as officials in a key county of the northwestern state of Oregon took San Francisco's lead and began marrying scores of same-sex couples. (Craig Mitchelldyer/Getty Images/AFP) FOR NEWSPAPERS AND TV USE ONLY

John Birmingham Encouraged by the reaction to their demand for a referendum on marriage equality, an unlikely coalition of Christian and Muslim groups has vowed to demand referenda on everything that interests them...

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John Birmingham

Lords of the land let loose

rent

John Birmingham The landlord came at them with a baseball bat. They hid behind a locked door as he screamed at them to get out. He’d previously smashed up some of their possessions to encourage them to vacate .

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Remembering the best of us

7 September 2012. News. Journalist Graham Downie. Canberra Times Photo by Jeffrey Chan.  Corporal Matthew Creek from the RMC band plays the last post during a wreath laying ceremony at the Australian War Memorial for the Australian National Servicemen's Association.

John Birmingham The northerlies blew for two days, whipping the sand up off the beach in stinging sheets and whorls and whips that lashed at every inch of exposed skin. And then, the night before Anzac Day, they ...

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Howard for GG ... and bring back Dad and Dave

john howard

John Birmingham Oh come now, John Howard would make an excellent Governor-General. Not as excellent as Prince Harry, who could be counted on to fast rope into Yarralumla, naked save for a couple of Vegas barmaids ...

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Come on CWA, think outside the box

cake

John Birmingham Hang your head in shame, Queensland. When archaeologists from the future (probably equipped with laser spades), dig up the reasons for the fall of our civilisation, it won’t be climate change ..

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Free floppies a policy flop

floppy disk

John Birmingham The Opposition Leader promised this week that every Australian household would receive a free floppy disk drive and monochrome monitor under an Abbott-led government.

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