The government has been hassling the opposition to ''show us your policies'' for yonks - a call that is growing only more raucous as September 14 approaches.
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On Thursday, however, with the shock and awe of a streaker at the footy, the Coalition revealed more than anyone was expecting.
The leaked, draft paper was titled innocuously enough: Developing Northern Australia - a 2030 Vision. But the detail was more devilish. Reportedly, the 30-page document includes plans to split Australia at the Tropic of Capricorn, create a new economic zone, move public servants north and develop Darwin, Cairns/Townsville and Karratha. That, and use $800 million of foreign aid to build a tropical health medical centre.
As the news broke on Thursday morn, Opposition Leader Tony Abbott was quick to put more distance between him and the paper than there is between Canberra and Karratha.
''It's certainly not policy,'' he said. ''It's a draft discussion paper which had a reasonably wide circulation and, obviously, someone's decided to share it with the media.''
But that wasn't enough to stop the likes of Simon Crean and Penny Wong throwing another pineapple ring on the barbie, courtesy of a ''TroppoTony'' hashtag on Twitter.
Greens leader Christine Milne dismissed the aid plan as a second-hand idea from Joh Bjelke-Petersen and Gina Rinehart. Turns out, there are some instances where recycling ain't such a good thing. Worryingly, the only people to give (parts of) the draft a thumbs-up were Barnaby Joyce and Bob Katter.
In question time, it was a tale of two regional centres. On the Coalition's side of the border, the population was focused on the surplus (and not delivering it), jobs (and not creating any) and superannuation (and not interfering with it). ''Should Australians start preparing for yet another broken promise?'' thundered Joe Hockey in Wayne Swan's direction.
On the government's side, the people were anxious to relate contemporary issues back to Vision 2030. When Craig Emerson was asked to update the House on how the Asian century plan would ''benefit the people of northern Australia'', there was only one place it was heading. And it wasn't the white paper.
Emerson thanked Tasmanian backbencher Dick Adams for his ''policy question'', before expounding on the ''completely wacko'' ideas of the Coalition.
The Speaker, Anna Burke, cautioned the Trade Minister that he was treading on ''thin ice'', but Emo didn't care. He wasn't the one feeling the tropical heat.
