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Order a decaf next time and just relax

Date

Chris Wilson

A cyclist rides on the eastern side of Commonwealth Avenue Bridge.

A cyclist rides on the eastern side of Commonwealth Avenue Bridge. Photo: Rohan Thomson

As a Canberra cyclist, I’m used to road rage. Even while riding in designated bike lanes, I’ve had drivers swerve their cars towards me, honk their horns, yell obscenities out their windows and even throw objects at me.

But now some people want to kick our well-padded behinds out of Canberra’s cafes and to the curb!

A cyclist at a coffee shop should be seen as a public service... the quality of coffee at a cafe can be measured by the bikes racked outside the front door and the hair-free legs under their tables. 

Them’s fighting words — and this time you’re not behind the wheel of a speeding, over-sized, urban four-wheel-drive.

The response to today’s article in The Canberra Times about the happy marriage of cycling and coffee shops can best be summed up by this online comment from JRD: 

cycling comment

Why stop there JRD?

Let’s also ban those trendy couples, wearing scarves and t-shirts in summer, pretending to hide behind dark designer sunglasses but wanting desperately to be seen. It’s revolting too.

Let’s kick out the parents trying to keep their restless toddlers stuck in seats by giving their kids babyccinos instead of attention. Revolting.

Block the public servants who are wasting tax-payer money by lining up every hour to order 10 takeaway lattes for their colleagues, only so they can stamp an entire loyalty card and get their caffeine-hit for free.  Re-volt-ing!

Let’s run the cyclists of Canberra out of coffee shops, then run the coffee shops of Canberra out of business.

A cyclist at a coffee shop should be seen as a public service.

Australian restaurants are awarded Chef Hats, but the quality of coffee at a cafe can be measured by the bikes racked outside the front door and the hair-free legs under their tables.

Cyclists are a picky bunch. They demand a good bean and a social scene.

So to people who agree with comments like those made by JRD, I suggest you maybe order a decaf next time and just relax.

Chris Wilson is sports editor of The Canberra Times and proud MAMIL (middle-aged man in lycra).

35 comments

  • I think the lycra tightening his nether regions is causing a deprevation of oxygen to the brain, you cyclists think too highly of yourselves, like hipsters with iPods and Skateboarders your just a pinch in the social scene, I would say the best way to know to avoid a coffee shop is the number of bikes and hairless legs, cos of the stench and billowing smell of self-satisfaction you lot give off like a bad smell along with the bad BO

    Commenter
    Frank
    Date and time
    November 21, 2012, 4:23PM
    • On yer Frank! snooty, moralistic, better than everyone cause I ride a bike pains in the padded seat! This group of self serving, treddlie pushing losers swarm into shops and coffee houses like they own the place! They drop their crappy bikes anywhere they like, scratch up the floor with their stupid clip shoes then pile out leaving an unholy mess...

      Treddlie riders take note, take a thermos when you ride and have yer coffee in a park somewhere!

      Commenter
      Hammer
      Location
      ACT
      Date and time
      November 21, 2012, 4:47PM
  • I'm not saying motorists are completely innocent but JRD's comment is both funny and accurate. The problem most people have with cyclists is that they take themselves far too seriously (overuse of lycra is indefensible) and frequently flout road rules, in particular slipping through red traffic lights, which understandably annoys other road users.

    Commenter
    sxx
    Location
    cbr
    Date and time
    November 21, 2012, 4:28PM
    • Driving to work I usually see at least 2 or more cars running red lights every morning as well.

      Commenter
      Ian
      Date and time
      November 21, 2012, 7:50PM
    • @ an. No. You might see a motorist speed up to push through an amber/red light. What you wont see it a motorist sitting at a red light, then when nothing is coming, just decide to go through instead of waiting for the green light.

      Commenter
      sxx
      Location
      cbr
      Date and time
      November 21, 2012, 9:19PM
    • Yes, and the cyclists riding five abreast, along with the few cars who run red lights, are a mere drop in the ocean compared to the numbers of rude, selfish and ignorant Canberra drivers who seem to think they have sole proprietorship of the right lane. If you are *about* to turn right, fine; but don't dawdle and hold up everyone else. If not, either speed up, or get over to the left lane where it is quite OK to travel as slowly as you wish.

      Commenter
      Robert
      Location
      Canberra
      Date and time
      November 21, 2012, 10:35PM
    • Agree with cars running red lights. I see it every day. Guess I still haven't got the updated road rules book which says amber lights mean you floor it and travel through the intersection as fast as possible.

      Commenter
      Rohan
      Date and time
      November 22, 2012, 8:44AM
  • Cyclists or not if there's good coffee I'll be there its pretty rare around town, as for the lycra I can just look away I guess :)

    Commenter
    betterthedevilyouknow
    Date and time
    November 21, 2012, 4:40PM
    • Do you think it would be ok for a group of sweaty blokes who had just finished footy training to rock up to your cafe, walse in in their boots and studs and plonk their sweaty behinds down next to you? I'm sure you would think to yourself "Yep, nothing wrong with that".

      Cyclists are doing the same thing and it stinks.

      Commenter
      takeitback
      Date and time
      November 21, 2012, 4:41PM
      • Another thing about lycra, you should only wear it if you have a body fat percentage < 20%. Anything more is a crime against humanity. And fashion.

        Commenter
        sxx
        Location
        cbr
        Date and time
        November 21, 2012, 4:41PM

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