Is there anyone out there looking forward to the return of the 44th Parliament? This year has already seen so much - arguably too much - in the dramedy they call Australian politics these days. For Laborites, having trudged through two leadership votes, a leadership change, an election campaign, an election defeat and then a leadership campaign, there is an overwhelming sense of JBOTCB (just bring on the Christmas break).
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For the Coalition camp, which has professed a distinct preference for governing calmly and methodically behind closed doors, the return of the Parliament presents something of a problemo. It will be hard to elude regular scrutiny when you're in the same building as an entire press gallery and you are required to turn up in the chamber for stuff (or so one might hope).
As for the rest of us, there is a heavy cloud of ennui that hangs over discussions around the nation's dinner tables, saloons and beer gardens. One side won on September 7 and won definitively. We've already heard everybody's arguments. Like, heaps of times. So JBOTCB.
But when you take a peek at those lining up for Federal Parliament 44, there is actually no shortage of people and phenomena to eagerly anticipate. Such as Bronwyn Bishop as speaker, for example.
The woman who kept the previous Parliament on its tippy toes with points of order sourced from page 500-and-something from the House Practice, already knows her way around the chamber. The original Bishop (yes, Julie, you ain't the first), may be diminutive, but her capacity for stern looks, sharp phrases (''farrago of mendacities'') and passion for fashion (the lady can rock a heel) mean she never goes unnoticed. I just can't wait for that first ''ORDER''. Will Bronwyn be high-pitched like Harry? Sonorous like Peter? Squawky like Anna? My bet is whatever the tone, it will be absolutely terrifying.
But it is hard to pick whether it will be more fascinating to see Bishop deal with Bob Katter, a notoriously unwieldy performer, or the new member for Fairfax.
Given Clive Palmer's penchant for hanging up on journalists if he doesn't like their line of questioning, one can only guess that he will take a robust approach to parliamentary debate. Yes, speaking of Clive, the Liberal National Party may not have made up its mind yet about whether it will challenge the result in Fairfax, but Mr/Professor Palmer will be in Canberra next week. As an MP.
Clive has already said he doesn't plan on turning up for every vote. So the question remains, what will he turn up for? He has also professed a keenness for the food at Parliament House. But given the lack of gastronomy within the parliamentary compound, what will he eat?
We already know a little bit about who he will be chatting to. When the seating plan was released for the House of Reps late on Thursday, came the revelation that Palmer would be bench buddies with the indie from Indi, Cathy McGowan. McGowan says she is looking forward to the chance to get to know Clive. He says it doesn't matter who he sits next to, it's what he does that counts.
McGowan carries one of the most gripping back stories to hit the new Parliament. But after felling Sophie Mirabella, the victorious McGowan now faces a Kosciuszko of work and learning. Indi has been mobilised by an optimistic grass roots movement that desperately wants to see more out of its politics. McGowan has also pledged to deliver on some thorny issues such as the NBN rollout, GP availability and the Wodonga-to-Melbourne railway.
So the plotline to follow for the next three years is how the member for Indi can deliver on the expectations of her electors and negotiate the fact that she is an inexperienced independent in a lower house swamped with wily Coalition MPs.
The new make-up of the house, of course, also presents us with some brand spanking match-ups. After Quentin gives the G-G go-ahead on Tuesday, we get to see Tony Abbott up against Bill Shorten. Both feeling their way in new jobs as they also try to get the measure of one another.
Other tantalising head-to-heads include Julie Bishop and Tanya Plibersek (both deputy leaders and both in foreign affairs) and Malcolm Turnbull (the old rising star) and Jason Clare (the new rising star) battling it out on fibres and nodes. There is also the pressing question of who will reach the more incensed shade of puce on the Coalition frontbench: Christopher Pyne or Barnaby Joyce.
And finally, because I just cannot help myself, how can you not want to tune in to see how Kevin Rudd goes on the backbench. You saw what happened last time.
Judith Ireland is a Fairfax Media journalist.
