Since marrying Simon Williams, Trapaga's been on a perpetual honeymoon. One filled with music, food, family and friends.

But here's the twist. This love affair is with New York City, the town where the two were married in 2009. Manhattan, a City Hall marriage licence, a reception at Shorty's 32 - a rib joint in Soho, where a mariachi band filled the tiny establishment with raucous Mexican music well into the night.

Given, Trapaga's still madly in love with Williams - ''I have never met a man as supportive, and who genuinely wants the best things for me … I have an extraordinary life with him'' - but, for the moment at least, her heart belongs to the city that never sleeps.

''I feel an absolute connection there,'' says Trapaga, back in Sydney to promote her latest book A Bite of the Big Apple, a love letter to New York and the things that matter most to her. ''I love the fact that anything can happen, the possibility of every single day, every single corner you walk around.

''The city is just so vibrant, there's so much life there. Everyone talks to everyone. I find it the most unjudgmental place in the world. Everyone takes you as you come. You can have a conversation with anyone.

''I find the whole place incredibly inspiring and invigorating, it's energy central.''

She has visited the city many times over her lifetime but in 2010 she felt a certain need to escape her responsibilities in Sydney for a while ''and while some might choose a deserted island, the hectic pace of New York is more calming to a busy mind like mine''.

''As an entertainer, New York is my spiritual home. As the song says, if you can make it there … I had a lot of plans, most of which did not survive - all I knew for certain was that a lot of cooking would be involved; food is how I make a place my own and put my mind at ease.''

A Bite of the Big Apple is more than a cookbook however. Sure, there are 60 recipes - from spicy oatmeal cookies from the Union Square Markets, to pulled pork sliders and plenty of tapas ideas ''to get the party started''. But the book is also a vivid collection of memories, of photographs and stories, illustrated with collages of ticket stubs, menus, fabric swatches, music sheets and hand-scribbled notes. (Trapaga did the collages herself. ''New York is this canvas, I just want to make things, I get very creative there,'' she says.)

Trapaga paints New York as a city that is very welcoming and friendly. The pages are filled with stories about people who invited her into their homes, of people she meets on the subway, in the markets while shopping for bread, and of people who are open and open-minded all at the same time.

Do people have New York all wrong? ''Totally!'' she says. ''I found New York to be very safe, very generous and kind. The things that people think New York is, aggressive, in your face, everyone is out to get you, it's not.

''I'll often go and sing in a club or just hang out and be coming home at three o'clock in the morning and I'll feel incredibly safe. I wouldn't do that in Sydney.

''It's a very different feeling. I love it for that reason.''

Every day she would venture to a new part of the city.

''Whether it be Brooklyn, Queens, Manhattan, The Bronx or Staten Island,'' she writes. ''The boroughs that make up New York are packed with people from all over the world. I don't believe there's another place on earth quite like it. In Australia we like to believe that we are leaders in cultural diversity, but we can't even begin to compare ourselves with the melting pot that is New York. What makes it unique is that all the people who have migrated here still hold fast to their heritage, and with that bring something of the wider world to the city.

''In New York, people treasure their history: what better way to own your heritage than through the food of your culture? It gives people a sense of pride in the past that says, I know who I am and where I come from.'' Trapaga revels in this diversity.

''You could live there a whole life and never experience everything,'' she says. ''There's so much on offer.

''I'd hear about something, read about something, you'd talk to people, you'd meet people on the subway … I've got lots of lovely friends in New York who are foodies, who just love their food. They're always saying to me, 'Come on, it's Sunday, we'll take you for a tour' and we'd do these fantastic tours through the Village or Chelsea.

''And it's just that thing, if you're open-minded and willing to try anything, or try everything, the world is your oyster in New York.

''People there have a conscience about what food they're eating, they love fresh produce, they love seasonal produce. The Union Square Market in the middle of Manhattan is one of my favourite places in the world; Chinatown, at the bottom of Canal Street, is mind-blowing; all the different areas of Brooklyn, Brooklyn is enormous and it has all these pockets of different nationalities. Where I was staying it was full of Hispanic people, full of Puerto Ricans and Mexicans, but if you want Greek or Indian, whatever, you would find it.

''The city has some of the world's best restaurants but I've had some of the most astounding meals in the tiniest places and that's what I wanted to write about. That adventure is the way to do New York. Try something that you've never tried before.''

Trapaga, 47, wrote the book with her daughter Lil Tulloch, 27. Tulloch is the oldest child in the blended family, with Phoebe, 27, Georgia, 25, Victoria, 22, Atticus, 18 and Oliver, 17, making up the extended clan.

''We're never far away from each other,'' Trapaga says.

''We work together all the time, everything in our lives, always working on projects and in shows, she's directing me, I'm directing her, and now we've got a beautiful vintage store together.

''We're pretty much in each other's pockets. Writing with her, getting the chance to show her my New York, was just fantastic.''

There are pieces from Tulloch throughout the book. One, towards the end of the book, after you learn that Trapaga and Williams have bought a loft apartment in Soho, where she says: ''Since I left home I have travelled more than I have stayed in one place … with such a transient life, it is important to create a sense of belonging and home so that you don't lose yourself too much … this is something that my mama has mastered.''

You sense that for Trapaga, and her daughter, indeed the whole family, belonging and home are terribly important ideas. For a woman with American, Hispanic and Filipino roots, in a city where Hispanic, Middle Eastern, Italian, Greek, African, Russian, Asian, Jewish and good old-fashioned American influences jump from every corner, every table, it seems only fitting that in New York they found this belonging.

■ A Bite of the Big Apple: My food adventure in New York. By Monica Trapaga and Lil Tulloch. (Lantern, $39.99.)