In case you've been living in world not concerned with James Packer's love life, you may not be aware that his former flame Mariah Carey will soon have her own TV series.
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We didn't ask for Mariah's World but it is the early Christmas gift we deserve and, coincidentally, her new make-up range by MAC will land in stores on Boxing Day.
The new "docu-series" is decidedly 2016 in that its themes are chaotic, farcical and over-the-top. The cosmetics are too, but despite the glittery gloss named Rainbow Interlude and candy pink Sweet Sweet Fantasy blush, the collection is decidedly demure and wearable.
The first episode is akin to waking from a general anaesthetic – confounding and comedic as we see the singer balance motherhood, her now-broken engagement to the Australian billionaire and an entire troupe of back-up dancers and personal assistants.
Underneath the artifice, the self-described diva showcases some handy life advice. Here's how to live your best life like Mariah:
It's a status symbol if you require help to put on your shoes, not a sign you lack motor skills
"Oprah told me 'don't let anybody think that you don't put your own shoes on anymore' and she's really right," Carey says, as four assistants lace her into a pair of skyscraper platform heels as she prepares for a night out in Capri.
"Problem is, these shoes are abusive and I can't put them on and I'm not going to lie about it."
If your relationship with a Packer goes south, get on the front foot with the PR
Make like the model formerly known as Kate Fischer and control the narrative early and control it often.
With the help of her new manager Stella Bulochnikov, Carey tidies up the tabloid rumours with a neat scene "postponing" the wedding in order to focus on her 27-concert, 25-country Sweet Sweet Fantasy tour.
Before Bulochnikov blows it by saying: "I've read the pre-nup. It's not the most romantic thing I've ever read."
Always wear sunglasses under fluorescent lighting
Carey is a hard worker, which is why she's always two hours late to rehearsals and choreography lessons. However she allegedly does her best work at night "after all day working on the engineering of the tour" and then goes to work with her dancers until 5am. Due to her upside-down schedule is it not confirmed if she has confused harsh lighting for damaging sunlight as she conducts the entire late night session wearing sunnies.
Mariah's World starts Monday, December 5 at 1pm, encore at 9.30pm on E!
