Heckler on Music
Heckler
Slow slide to insensible senescence
Heckler WHEN I was a teenager, a common refrain among my friends was that it would be our worst nightmare to become like our parents.
Heckler
Hold the phone, I'm practising the piano
Heckler THINKING of ways to fit everything into my busy life, I have come up with a practical way to save time: I practise the piano as I drive to work. That's correct.
Heckler
And, still the truth goes up in smoke
Heckler IN THREE weeks' time, cigarette inspectors will start patrolling stores to make sure shelves are lined with drab green boxes.
Heckler
Tantrum of the opera lets us down
Heckler I'M A 70-YEAR-OLD, impoverished Pom who makes economies most of the time so I can come cattle class to Sydney twice a year to see my two lovely grandchildren.
Heckler
Beached Boys show they're just washed up
Heckler SURELY it's only a matter of time until the phrase "dying on stage" becomes an SMH headline, and I, for one, don't want to be there to see someone who was big in the '70s and is now into their 70s...
Heckler
Doctor in the house has to be patient
Heckler I AM a mother and a doctor, so on both counts I am not supposed to get ill. Also, it is not very professional to cough more than your patients, let alone scare children by wearing a surgical mask.
Heckler
Echidna is symbolic, to coin a phrase
Heckler THIS is a heckle about my favourite shekel: the 5 cent piece. The coffee machine at work says all coins are accepted, but not 5 cent pieces! Most payphones say the same.
Heckler
Plenty of clicks and cricks in my old chassis
Heckler IF MY body was a used car that was for sale I'm not sure that I would buy it.
Heckler
Hint of pain but little to gain in book
Heckler AFTER seeing the Fifty Shades of Grey trilogy dominating all Top 10 booklists for the past month I finally succumbed and read the first book.
Heckler
New Google offering has my mind boggling
Heckler I READ the other day that Google have invented ''Google glasses''. They are like spectacle frames with built-in smart things like cameras, microphones, communication systems, computing power and a...
Heckler
Shop rides have parents seeing red
Heckler My blood boils when I see the Wiggles' Big Red Car or Bob the Builder's tractor.
Heckler
An Olympic legacy from which we can't escape
Heckler WITH the London Olympics almost upon us, it's only a matter of time before we see articles in the press about Sydney's legacy from Homebush 2000.
Heckler
Drop the marks, full stop
Heckler JUST imagine for a minute if you can a world without punctuation At school in the 70s we spent hours painstakingly inserting dots and squiggles and other odd symbols between perfectly sensible words...
Heckler
Pain of modern paeans
Heckler WHY doesn't God turn them into pillars of salt? Or at least send a bolt of lightning or two?
Heckler
Life is too short for plodding
Heckler APPARENTLY, the elixir of eternal life has been discovered. It is a very secret development, with only certain ''Privileged Ones'' privy to its existence.
Heckler
Test patrons not patience at concerts
Heckler THERE should be a requirement for all concert patrons to pass a test before being issued with a permit to attend concerts.
Heckler
Devil is in the retail
Heckler THE end of the working day is everyone's favourite time of the day. Those of us who work in retail are no exception to feeling jubilation when 5pm, 5.30pm or 9pm creeps up.
Heckler
It's so sad - sorry seems to be the easiest word
Heckler WHY do people constantly apologise to me? If I dash across a road in front of a car, chances are the driver will wind down the window and shout ''Sorry''.
Heckler
How to hit a sour note
Heckler I AM fed up and I can't take it any more, so I am sending a warning. The hordes of the rude and the sick that insist on going to the Opera House concert hall have tried their best to ruin the music...
Heckler
Concerted etiquette
Heckler I HAVE turned into one of those grumpy old women who turn around and glare at people who talk during concerts.
