Warwick McFayden ''When I use a word,'' Humpty Dumpty said, in rather a scornful tone, ''it means just what I choose it to mean ... .''
Heckler I've just read Harriet Veitch's Heckler column ''Mon dieu! It's a nightmare'' (October 4). I am French, but I fully agree that French is hard to learn as a second language.
Heckler Living abroad for more than a decade, I have observed with voyeuristic fascination the creeping bastardisation of the English language in Australia.
Elizabeth Farrelly I'm cultivating the knack of being diametrically out of whack with public or market opinion. It's a potentially dangerous pursuit, considering my line of work, but I see it as a sort of x-treme sport.
Mary-Ruth Mendel The average four- to five-year-old has a listening vocabulary of 2800 words, which grows to an amazing 13,000 words by the time the child is between five and six.
Adele Horin Not so long ago politicians such as Bob Carr were denouncing the dumbing down of the Higher School Certificate curriculum. John Howard, no less, took up the cudgels, singling out HSC English.
Peter Craven What a Hollywood dream of cinematic distinction the Oscars are.
Ian Rose There's no worries about celebrating Australian English.
AS I remember, it began simply enough. A new home. Some boxes to unpack. A little paint here and there. And then one evening, my wife returned home and announced she had bought a lawn mower.
Mark Joseph Stern An Australian creationist believes Charles Darwin is to blame for drug abuse and pornography, and that people rode dinosaurs.
Paul Collins I'm still getting over the shock of the Vatican's announcement of Pope Benedict XVI's resignation.
Paul Sheehan We didn't need to wait for the TV ratings to know that in the head-on clash between the two kitchen blockbusters, one would block and the other would bust. It was pre-ordained.
Elizabeth Farrelly The terrace house gives a whole new meaning to the idea of the London tube. London's standout characteristic, as you trek in by taxi or train, is neither its veiled beauty nor its vile weather,...
Jacqueline Maley News of the death of pre-menstrual syndrome came as a terrible shock.
Michael Shmith The puzzle-setter's announcement of his terminal cancer was admirably cryptic.
Martin McKenzie-Murray JFK, Tiger, Armstrong - you'd think we would have learnt our lesson by now.
Richard Glover Here, in the spirit of the Dag's Dictionary, is a dictionary of words you may need to use as you navigate your way through the Australia Day weekend.
Germaine Greer It is not readers' fault Australian writers cannot make a living. And it's not the writers' fault, either.
Ben Hart Many new fathers are told they don't have a role in their baby's life.
Stephen Bayley I am an idiot. You could be one, too, and it would not be disappointing. In fact, I recommend it. Idiocy is misunderstood.