Christian Lealiifano sat with his shattered family moments after being diagnosed with leukaemia and told them, "we'll get through this together". The last thing he expected was sister Sally's "gift" to save his life.
Subscribe now for unlimited access.
$0/
(min cost $0)
or signup to continue reading
It's fitting Lealiifano has a reminder of his family tattooed on his left arm as he prepares for a bone-marrow transplant with Sally in Melbourne at the start of November.
It's the next and crucial stage of an upbeat and positive Lealiifano's treatment for the blood disease. News of Lealiifano's illness shocked the rugby world and rocked the tight-knit ACT Brumbies community two months ago.
Brumbies captain Lealiifano, who is in remission, opened up on Friday about his cancer fight to raise awareness for the Light the Night walk, saying he has been overwhelmed by worldwide support and he hopes to make a rugby comeback.
His family – partner Luga, mum Mafa and six siblings – have been Lealiifano's rock as he pushed through dark times. His son, Jeremih, has been his motivation because "he needs a dad and that's my job".
SISTER'S GIFT
Lealiifano has been through two bouts of chemotherapy to prepare him for a bone-marrow transplant, which will mean being based in Melbourne for up to four months.
His six siblings were tested to see if they were able to offer their bone marrow and Sally was the one who came back as a match for her older brother.
"It's a blessing for our family with what we're going through," an emotional Lealiifano said.
"It fills my heart with all of those emotions – pride, happiness, being grateful. But the big one is love. It's a special gift [what Sally is doing], the most special gift anyone could give.
"To have someone in the family be able to donate, to give me every chance of beating this and, essentially, saving my life, it's very, very special."
Lealiifano and Sally are the two youngest in the family and share a close bond.
Lealiifano will have another round of chemotherapy before starting the transplant and spending 28 days in hospital to give his immune system time to rebuild.
It his hoped Lealiifano's body doesn't reject Sally's bone marrow and he will stay in Melbourne for tests and check-ups every few days until the start of next year.
"Some of the brothers were gutted when they found out they weren't the match," Lealiifano laughs.
"We knew a transplant was the best way of beating it and when when we found out [Sally was a match] it was probably the most enjoyable day through all of this.
"It gets me quite emotional, I'm close with Sally and it's not only my sister, it makes you think of everyone in the world who donates and how special that is."
THE NEWS THAT FLOORED LEALIIFANO
Lealiifano was training in Canberra in August when he started to feel ill.
He was supposed to be getting a medical clearance to fly to Japan to start a Super Rugby off-season stint with Suntory.
The moment he saw a message from Brumbies doctor Stephen Freeman saying: "Cancel the flight to Japan, we need to talk", Lealiifano knew something was serious.
By 5pm on a Thursday he had been told he had leukaemia. By 7.30pm he was in hospital and by Saturday he had started treatment.
"When you hear the word 'cancer' you think straight away, 'am I going to live'? But I turned to how was I going to get better," Lealiifano said.
"Some of the conversations with specialists were hard because they were brutally honest, which I guess they have to be. There are risks and things that might not go your way.
"I'm taking it day by day and I didn't really think about the worst, it was about how I was going to get healthy again."
Lealiifano's leukaemia was aggressive and had started multiplying. "I was lucky they got it early," he said.
THE SILVER LINING
Lealiifano is facing an uncertain period and there is a risk his body may reject the bone-marrow transplant.
But the silver lining to his illness is the fact he's been at home to watch his first child, Jeremih, grow in the first months of his life.
"I feel for Luga because she's been looking after two babies – one four-month-old and a 29-year-old," Lealiifano grinned.
"I'm super grateful for everything Luga has done and seeing Jeremih grow has been so special.
"It's a big motivator for me, he needs a father in his life and that's my job. I need to get better for him, that drives me every day."
SMILING THROUGH THE TOUGH TIMES
Anyone who has met Lealiifano knows his smile can light up whatever room he walks into. His mental resilience has won him plenty of praise in a 10-year career.
Lealiifano was smiling and laughing on Friday despite some tough battles, but said on occasions he was stuck in bed and drained of energy.
"At the start we spoke about being positive no matter how bad the days get, we've got to lean on each other and get through it," Lealiifano said.
"My family has been amazing, just smiling or having a joke because I get energy from that.
"Some days are really tough. You've got to acknowledge them because there's no point trying to fake it. You have to get through it and move forward."
TARGETING A RUGBY COMEBACK
Lealiifano rates himself a "30 per cent" chance of playing in the 2017 Super Rugby campaign and says the desire to return to the field is helping him push through his recovery.
The Brumbies will offer him a coaching role if he's unable to play to keep him around the group.
"I like to dream big and think I can play next season but I also have to be realistic," Lealiifano said.
"It could be a 12-month recovery or longer. This thing could take a few years and that's hard. There are so many risks and it's an intricate process.
"I'm 29 now and I feel even if I get back at 31 years old I'll be super keen."
THE WORLDWIDE SUPPORT
Lealiifano has been floored by the support from people in Canberra and around the world since the news broke of his illness.
Brumbies and Wallabies teammates visited him in hospital, players in Australia, France and England – including Matt Giteau, Matt Toomua, David Pocock, Jake White and Nic White – shaved their heads and letters, emails and social media messages have been rolling in.
"It's pretty humbling and emotional to see those things, I haven't been able to get back to everyone but the support doesn't go unnoticed," Lealiifano said.
"The [Wallabies players] who shaved their heads, I told them they didn't need to but it was their way of showing me their support.
"That's keeping me super strong knowing there's support around the world. I'm so grateful, the biggest thing is I know I'm not alone. There's my family and then the bigger rugby family, I can't thank them enough."
Brumbies and Canberra Vikings players, as well as family members, joined Lealiifano in the Light the Night walk on Friday.
Brumbies chief executive Phil Thomson has raised almost $6000, while Trevor Hancock, a Brumbies member, has raised almost $3000.
Hancock's under-11s Royals team shaved their heads last month to show their support for Lealiifano and raised $8000 for the Leukaemia Foundation.
Lealiifano sent a hand-written note to the children to say thanks.
"The bravery and courage they showed [to shave their heads] ... that gave me strength, too," Lealiifano said.
"It's frightening how common this is and I've seen other people in worse positions than me. To have people rally around [for Light the Night] to know this can be beaten and shine a light on a dark topic, that's powerful.
"As crap as it is, I'm really positive and reasonably confident. I think I've got to be, there's no point being any other way unless people tell me otherwise. I'm in a good place mentally and emotionally."
