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Where's the mistletoe?

What Christmas gift do you buy for the person who has everything - their own way, that is.

Maybe a Christmas card is a good start, because there's a few sporting identities who've no doubt been crossed off many a list this year.

But let's not be Christmas grinches and hold grudges. 'Tis the season to drink, be merry and quickly maximise earnings by stepping into the boxing ring against some chump before lining up for next footy season.

And the really exciting thing is that no one can predict in what footy code that will be just yet because New Year's resolutions have a longer lifespan than sporting contracts.

So in the spirit of Christmas, here's the sporting personalities we'd like drawn back together for Secret Santa.

Israel Folau and Ricky Stuart


It was only a few weeks ago Stuart used his newspaper column to predict Folau would be a bigger success in the NRL than Sonny Bill Williams. Well, Izzy certainly left SBW for dead in one department, the speed of his exit from the code.

The only thing that turned quicker was Stuart's attitude towards Folau when he found out the serial code-hopper was going to rugby union with the Tahs instead of committing to the Eels.

''I'd rather know today about the dishonourable characteristics of Israel than pay him all the money that we tried to secure over the past eight weeks, then find out about the way he operates,'' Stuart said.

Quade Cooper and Robbie Deans

Cooper spoke out about the ''toxic'' culture in the Wallabies squad earlier this year, but says he now wants to play rugby under Deans in the Australian team again.

''If I get the opportunity to play for Australia again, we will go about it like any other player and coach,'' Cooper said on Friday.

Sceptical? Perhaps Cooper does have a point. Look again at what he said: ''Like any other player and coach.'' Take, for example …

Bernard Tomic and Pat Rafter

If only Tomic could fire himself up in the same way he revs his bright orange Beamer.

Rafter might look like a laidback dude in his Bonds undies, but it obviously infuriates the former world No. 1 to see such a waste of talent in 20-year-old Tomic.

It's a big call by Rafter to dump Tomic from the Davis Cup squad for February's tie, given the lack of depth in Aussie tennis. Then again, we are playing Taiwan.

Anthony Mundine and Dan Geale

In a rare sporting event, on January 30 in Sydney, two boxers will actually face off in the ring.

The only thing more controversial than Mundine's comments in the lead-up to their bout was the split points decision to Mundine in their first match-up, back in 2009.

Mundine recently claimed Australia is a racist country. Mind you, this was after he questioned the Aboriginal heritage of Geale and had this enlightening comment about his opponent's Tasmanian background: ''I thought they wiped all the Aborigines from Tasmania out.''

If only Mundine could give himself an upper-cut.

Grant Buchanan and Matt Kelly

The two golf caddies had more swings around the Lakes layout at this week's Australian Open than their bosses, James Nitties and Marc Leishman.

Buchanan and Kelly are supposedly mates, but the pair came to blows on the golf course on Thursday and had to be separated.

If only it had been on pay-for-view. Finally, Australia would have had a fight worth watching.