If the mere sight of "Will you marry me?" smoked across the sky or the latest viral video of someone proposing every day for a year turns you into a puddle of anxious sweat, this tale isn't for you.
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Even 42-year-old Bryce Jarvis wasn't sure if his girlfriend Jacqui Pelletier would enjoy his very public marriage proposal. She's quiet, reserved, and in no way "grandiose", says Jarvis. But she's used to his constant surprises, and he wasn't going to let the opportunity slip.
"I just wanted to show the whole world how much I love her. I've never had anyone love me the way she loves me; it's unconditional," Jarvis says.
"I knew I needed to lock it down."
It's this resolve that saw him approach Lucille Bailie, general manager of the Canberra Capitals, to arrange a special kind of proposal. Patience was required.
"New Year's Eve came and went, it was very hard to sit on that and not ask her in that time. But then I figured it would be a cliche to ask her on New Year's anyway."
So it's fitting that he carved out his own destiny courtside, and proposed at the Canberra Capitals v Bendigo Spirit game last Saturday night.
At quarter-time, Pelletier was selected as a "pretend" contestant in a crowd-interaction game. She was blindfolded, believing she was searching for the team mascot. Instead, she was lead to her love mascot, Jarvis, waiting on one knee.
So, was he nervous? "Hell yes! I heard all this clapping, and one man booing. But he was drowned out by the women cheering."
The couple are quite the Capitals supporters. Pelletier has been since last year, when she left Wagga Wagga to join Jarvis in Canberra.
"Going to the Capitals games together has been a way for her to feel like a Canberran."
These outlandish proposals certainly aren't for everyone. Personally, I hope my boyfriend cheerfully accepts a robust donkey as my proposal, and we get on with it. But judging by the number of punters cheering during the proposal, Jarvis might have set a new standard.
"Blokes might give me a hard time at the pub."
Pelletier and Jarvis met on an online dating site 16 months ago. He knew as early as last year that he wanted to be her husband.
They've both been married before, so this time they're doing things differently.
"I said to her: 'If the Capitals win the championship this year, we'll get married at a game. If they don't, it'll be a long engagement.'
"We shared the engagement with 1500 other people, so we might keep the wedding just for us. I think we might elope."
