A south Canberra man who pinned his wife down and pulled her by the hair as he demanded oral sex in an hour-long ordeal has been handed a suspended jail sentence.
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The 44-year-old offender's violence against his wife of 17 years prompted an ACT Supreme Court judge to condemn the man's behaviour and send the message that sex was "a matter of choice, not subjugation".
The man pleaded guilty in the Magistrates Court to assault with an intent to have sexual relations and to an act of indecency. The attack took place on July 10, while the couple's three children were at home.
Court documents said the pair were drinking and watching television when the man asked the woman to give him oral sex.
When she refused, the man grew angry and continued to ask until his wife started to cry.
"Do you think your crying is going to get what you want?" he said.
"It's your job to do it."
He continued to demand sex, as he pinned the woman to a bed by her shoulders and pulled her by her hair.
"Your tears are turning me on," he said.
The woman pleaded with her husband to stop and he eventually told her to "go and sleep with the children", court documents said.
She called the police and they arrived to find the woman distressed and the man with scratch marks to his face, arms, neck and torso.
A pre-sentence report said the man did not have a criminal history before his arrest and had started counselling to help manage a problem with alcohol.
The man had been living at home with his family since his bail conditions were amended on July 28 and he said he was working to "rebuild the relationship".
The report said there was a low risk the man would reoffend, but the incident was not an isolated incident of abuse in the marriage.
There were ongoing concerns for the woman's safety and the potential impact of the domestic abuse on the couple's children.
Acting Justice David Robinson handed down his sentence on Wednesday and said only a term of imprisonment was appropriate.
"There is a need to punish this offending and to send a clear message by way of general deterrence to others that participation in sexual behaviour is a matter of choice, not subjugation," he said.
He sentenced the man to one year and nine months' jail for the assault and to seven months in prison for the act of indecency. He ordered both sentences be fully suspended upon the man entering a three-year good behaviour bond.