Luke Jackson "grew up wondering what the f--k was going on".
He grew up in unforgiving Hobart suburbs surrounded by suicide, violence, drugs, and alcohol. He seemed a world away from one day challenging for an interim world title inside a boxing ring.
This is Jackson's story. So often he has found himself in dark places and felt there was no way out. Moments like this are why he kept pushing.
On Wednesday night, aged 35, Jackson (19-1) faces Tyson Lantry (7-3) in a lightweight bout at Western Sydney Stadium on the undercard of Tim Tszyu's trans-Tasman showdown with Bowyn Morgan.
There were times he lived alone as a teenager, bouncing in and out of his mother and father's homes after they split up. Substance abuse was an outlet from the tragedies which would follow, sparking a battle with depression.
"It's something I've suffered with throughout my life. I had a couple of people close to me kill themselves when I was younger," Jackson said.
"My mum's boyfriend, my sister's father. It happened pretty close to each other. I was like 'what's going on? Why is everyone killing themselves?'
"I grew up wondering what the f--k was going on. It's something I've always thought about, thinking it's what people do when things get hard."
Olympian Billy Ward, Commonwealth Games bronze medallist Ben McEachran and young boxer Dwayne Lally suffered the same fate.
"It's a f---ing terrible thing, mate. I've been in dark places before when I've thought 'there is no way out', but I've found a way out," Jackson said.
"It absolutely breaks my heart these people have got to the point where they felt there was no way out. There is always a way out, there is always something that can be done.
"That's what upsets me, that people get so low they can't see it. Trust me, I've been there.
"Thankfully I've been lucky enough where something has happened to make me see a little bit of a green light, and I've come through it."
Now Jackson is making a difference to a cause so close to heart.
When most struggled for motivation when COVID-19 derailed society as we know it, Jackson took on the David Goggins Stay Hard run challenge - running four miles [6.4 kilometres], every four hours for 48 hours.
"Then I made my own run challenge and made it even harder than that, and raised $15,000 for suicide prevention," Jackson said.
Jackson is proof you can turn your life around. His childhood resembled something more like a hell he never wants to go back to. He went on to challenge Carl Frampton in a main event at Belfast's Windsor Park.
Then last year, when his world was falling apart, he started over with new trainer Fidel Tukel, a man he wishes he met 10 years ago, "but better late than never".
"I was gone, lost, I cannot believe I allowed myself to go there. I was on the drink all the time. I don't know how I got so low," Jackson said.
"Now looking back, it was the best thing that happened. It's been a blessing in disguise. When shit is going bad, you've just got to keep going and eventually things turn out for the better."