"I'm better when people are nasty to me, I'm more of a fighter," the Ainslie Tricolours coach says with the slightest hint of a smile.

Yet the tears suggest confronting the reality of his wife Julie's battle with lung cancer remains as hard as ever.

So if only for a few hours, Ainslie's hunt for a fourth consecutive AFL Canberra premiership against the Belconnen Magpies at Manuka Oval on Saturday will provide the Rourke family with solace.

It will be a chance for the family to be together again - at last count Rourke says there are 18 making the trip from all over.

It will be a chance to say thank you to those who came out of retirement for a beloved coach doing it tough.

It will simply be "a really big thing for the family".

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"We're using it as a celebration, it'll be good. It's a big day. We got good news this week. We're pleased everyone will be here," Rourke says.

"My nieces, nephew, sister, brother, they're all flying up and everyone is getting around us. We've got a daughter in Melbourne, a daughter in Albury, a daughter in Sydney, a daughter on the Central Coast.

"My brother and sister are from Melbourne and they're hellbent on getting up here."

Grand final week at Ainslie is often centred on a theme. Last year it was "legacy" - apt given their third consecutive grand final win was the final chapter in the careers of a handful of stars who could see no better way to go out.

Until the call came.

The least the likes of Aaron Wiles, Ashley Harris, Liam O'Neil and Mitchell Ward could do was lace up the boots for the coach that is like "a father figure", for the family that is like an extension of their own.

They are only a handful of names among the scores Rourke has been "blessed" to coach during his 12-year stint with the Tricolours.

But for much of this year "the players have coached themselves" with Jim Rice walking in Rourke's shoes, for the coach's focus has been where it belongs: at home.

Come 2.15pm on Saturday, the Rourke family will return the favour.

So perhaps there could be no better them this year than just that: family.

"In the first hour after the grand final finishes, it's probably the best feeling you have outside your family," Rourke says.

"Everybody is hugging everybody, you work so hard for it. We love success. They want to win, we love winning, that's what we're here for.

"They love success. Everybody loves success. We have a really good club.

"It was great for these boys to come back. They've been unbelievably supportive to the family over the past nine months."

The support goes far beyond the walls of the football club just off Limestone Avenue.

For times like this reduce the four quarters of football each team plays every weekend to a mere side note.

Times like these see Lexie Bennett - a Belconnen Magpies star standing in Ainslie's way this week - pick up the phone just to offer support. So too have Eastlake coach Peter McGrath and Bob Hughes from Tuggeranong.

"That's football. Football cops a lot of bad press, but when times are tough, the community bands together," Rourke says.

"We play footy to win it, but we also realise when someone is doing it tough, the footy community gets around us."

AFL CANBERRA GRAND FINALS

Saturday at Manuka Oval:

Rising Stars: Tuggeranong Hawks v Marist College at 9.30am

Second grade: Eastlake Demons v Belconnen Magpies at 11.45am

Men's: Ainslie Tricolours v Belconnen Magpies at 2.15pm

Women's: Queanbeyan Tigers v Belconnen Magpies at 5.30pm