Canberran steps down after six years as head of R U OK?

He is number 10 among the 13 siblings, the family growing up in Holder, parents Maree and Peter at the helm.

"Growing up in a big family definitely helped me develop a strong sense of independence, fairness and gratitude later on. It’s also probably why I eat really fast,'' Brendan deadpanned.

"Mum and dad would have made some big sacrifices to keep the household running, send all the girls to Merici and the boys to Marist. Saturday sport was just a taxi service, not to mention all the other running around. I’m really thankful for that.

"I guess I only really fully appreciated that later in life. Our house was noisy, busy and there would often be extra guests for dinner or visiting, staying over. We just rolled with it. An extra place was set at the table or a bed or a mattress was found.

"The neighbours must have all breathed a sigh of relief when the Mahers finally moved out of Craven Place in Holder. Peace and quiet at last."

Those words say a lot about 41-year-old Maher. He's funny, down-to-earth, unpretentious. Aware of others and their needs. Conscious of his good fortune.

Those qualities have held him in good stead for the last six years as the chief executive officer of the national suicide prevention organisation, R U OK?

Maher, who lives in Gordon, fulfilled the role while still living in Canberra, travelling to Sydney two days a week, doing the rest remotely. He has been credited with growing what was a small, grassroots charity into "one of Australia's most recognised suicide prevention and mental health promotion campaigns''.

Now Maher has announced he is leaving the role, finishing up in March.

"I'm coming on to six years with the organisation and I kind of had a plan to stay there for three,'' he said.

"And I just feel the organisation is in incredibly good shape and I want to leave while I'm in a good position and not at a stage when I perhaps might have run out of puff.

"It's a good opportunity to give the organisation a fresh set of eyes and ideas.''

A former general manager of Lifeline Australia, Brendan is looking for a new challenge.

"I'm keen to stay in the community sector if I can and I've got a very strong interest in mental health and suicide prevention,'' he said.

"I'll be staying on the board of R U OK?, providing it works with wherever I go next.''

And he wants to stay in Canberra. He lives with his partner of 14 years, Tanya Senior, and is step-dad to Ayden, Shannon and Jade.

"I love Canberra and moving to Sydney for this role [with R U OK?] really wasn't an option and I'm very grateful to the board that they allowed me to have that flexible working arrangement.

"Canberra is where the family is. The pace of Canberra gives you space you need to work in this [mental health] environment.''

R U OK? started with an idea by Sydney adman Gavin Larkin, who was driven by the loss of his father Barry to suicide in 1995.

The first R U OK? Day was held in 2009. It was billed as "a national day of action dedicated to reminding everyone that any day is the day to ask, 'Are you ok?' and support those struggling with life ''.

The organisation started with a staff of three and 10 years later, runs with a still-lean workforce of nine.

Gavin Larkin died of lymphoma in 2011. His 15-year-old son Gus died as a result of a brain tumour two years later. Larkin's legacy looms large.

"Gavin was a big personality,'' Maher said. "He wasn't going to let the slow-turning wheels of this sector stop him from initiating his idea. He came from a place of lived experience. Gavin was highly motivated to bring some meaning and address the regrets he might have had about what he could have done when [his father] Barry wasn't going so well.

"He traumatised himself about what he could have said and what he could have done and he used his influence to start this movement.''

Gavin's wife Maryanne is still very much involved with R U OK? She adores Maher.

"He's very affable and people take to him,'' she said. "He is just a natural being. He's experienced and just a very, very good people person. Good listener, good leader. I'm very sad to see him go. He's been a very good anchor for me and the kids and keeping us close to the organisation.''

Maher graduated from the University of Canberra in 1998 with a bachelor of communication, majoring in advertising and marketing.  He joined the advertising agency that would eventually be known as Zoo Communications and from there, went to Lifeline, one of his clients at the agency.

In 2013, Maher arrived at R U OK? with this solid grasp of the mental health sector and a head for business. He helped grow the organisation into a thriving and sustainable charity.

"I think what I brought to the role was an understanding of what happens at the crisis level, at the pointy end, after seven years with Lifeline, but I've also spent the last six years in an upstream role,  where we're looking at what we can do as human beings when we see someone who is a little bit bent out of shape and how can we get alongside them and have a conversation long before they need a bigger intervention like Lifeline or perhaps hospitalisation,'' he said.

Maher quadrupled annual revenue during his tenure with R U OK?. No mean feat in the competitive not-for-profit sector and especially for a charity that prides itself on not "rattling tins''.

Under Maher’s stewardship, R U OK? also attracted national corporate partners including Virgin Australia, Audi, Sensis, Twinings, Flight Centre Foundation, Connor and Yellow.

In the last 12 months, more than 100 countries have enquired about adopting the R U OK? framework to implement in their respective corners of the world.

“It’s remarkable to consider that R U OK? has generated global interest and may help save lives beyond its country of origin one day in the future,'' he said

R U OK?  is also a brand awareness success story. In 2018, an estimated 80 per cent of Australians were aware of R U OK? Day, with one in four of those people taking part in a significant way.

Maher hopes the organisation, now in its 10th year, is in a position where it will continue to make a meaningful impact on the country's suicide rates when he hands over to the next CEO.

The 2017 Australian Bureau Statistics revealed 8.7 people took their lives daily - up from 8.3 the previous year with Australian men accounting for six of those deaths, each day.

Maher says it is difficult to pinpoint one factor which could prevent suicide.

"That’s a really difficult question because suicide is such a complex issue. Interventions come in many different forms. Sometimes the person in crisis reaches out for help at a critical time, other times it requires a direct intervention from someone else to keep them safe,'' he said.

"However, I believe if we all had the confidence and skills to have a conversation with someone in crisis, the community as a whole would be better equipped to support someone who is thinking about suicide. Better equipped because we understand some of the signs and behaviours and know what steps to take.

"In reality, most of the population aren’t equipped to have conversations with people in crisis. These are conversations often too big for most of us.

"Gatekeeper training programs like ASIST (Applied Suicide Intervention Skills Training); Mental Health First Aid and online training like QPR (Question, Persuade, Refer), provide some valuable skills and guidance on supporting someone who is at risk of suicide. My experience of the training is that it can be pretty confronting, challenges a lot of the assumptions we might have made, but can be incredibly valuable.''

R U OK? chair Mike Connaghan said of Maher, “It’s thanks to Brendan’s business acumen and his experience within the sector, that R U OK? is in such good shape. He will be missed.”

Maher hopes his years as the CEO have lived up to Gavin Larkin’s vision.

“When making decisions I often think, 'What would Gav do?'. 'What would Gav think of that?'. He’s always on our minds and his memory and energy guides our choices," he said.

“Overall? I think he’d give us a nod and tell us we’ve done all right, but he’d also want to see a reduction in suicide, so we’ve definitely still got work to do.”

This year's R U OK?  Day is on September 12. More details at https://www.ruok.org.au/join-r-u-ok-day

Support is available by calling Kids Helpline on 1800 551 800, Lifeline on 131 114, or beyondblue on 1300 22 46 36.