Don't you always wonder whether authors have a book they wish they'd written? Or whether they think it's worth sticking with a bad book? Or even how they came to writing?
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As the Canberra Writers Festival swings into gear we asked five of our favourite authors a few questions about writing and reading.
The festival will take place from Friday August 25 to Sunday August 27, 2017, showcasing local, national and international writers at more than 100 events, in eight iconic venues, across three days and includes in-conversation sessions, workshops, special events, book launches and keynote events.
Go to canberrawritersfestival.com.au for the full program and more details.
In the meantime, enjoy these fun answers and start reading.
Kathy Lette
What was the first story you ever wrote? How old were you?
Aged eight I won my first school prize for best story. I'm pretty sure there were princesses and possums involved.
What was the first book you read that made you think maybe you could become a writer?
Pride and Prejudice. Austen's acerbic style is more controlled than a pair of Oprah Winfrey's Spanx. Beneath her humorous veneer, Jane's a barbed commentator on the battle between the sexes. In Edwardian England women were seen as breeding cows and wedlock was little more than a padlock But Lizzie Bennett's determined to prove she's more than just a life support system to an ovary. Austen realised that "poetic justice" is the only true justice in the world – and set about impaling misogynistic enemies on the end of her pen. She inspired me to follow satirical suit.
What's the worst book you've ever read?
50 Shades of Grey - a Mills and Boon fantasy jazzed up with S&M. I feel sure I speak for all women when I say that we don't like to be beaten – not even at Monopoly. Boys, there are only a few basic ways to please a woman: stacking the dishwasher and not snoring. A woman's biggest sex fantasy in the bedroom involves a man picking his underpants up off the floor.
Should you stick with a bad book?
No.
Is there a book you wish you had written? Why?
Vanity Fair. With tongue in cheek and lashings of chutzpah, Becky Sharpe was the Madonna of her day, flaunting tradition and challenging hypocritical sexual mores. Okay, she had a few minor faults: snobbery and sexual kleptomania (Becky climbed the social ladder – lad by lad). … But we're talking 1810. For women, it was domestic service, prostitution or marriage (often a tautology in those days). Thackeray's savage social satire is sharp enough to shave your legs.
Why do you think Canberra gets such a bad rap?
I like everything about Canberra – especially how you conquer the great indoors: the national museum, gallery and library with its fab Bookplate café (books of course, are a mental macchiato) ... Although I also like the Arboretum's cork forest (must be all the wine I've consumed which draws me here).
Why should readers come and see you at the CWF?
As it's still a man's world, blowing comedic raspberries at blokes is therapeutic. Laugh and the world laughs with you ... cry and you get salt in your champers. (Men attend at your own risqué).
Kathy Lette is speaking at the Women in the Media lunch at the National Press Club on Friday, August 25, 11.30am; Live! At the National Library of Australia on Saturday. August 26 at 2pm; and part of the Girls Night In: Live and Dangerous event on Sunday, August 27
Nikki Gemmell
What was the first story you ever wrote? How old were you?
The first "proper" piece of writing was published in my school magazine – The Keiraville Kookaburra – when I was eight. It was a poem about the circus. It was vile and cliched and repetitive, but seeing my name typed up underneath it was a thrill I've never forgotten. It set me on the writerly path.
What was the first book you read that made you think maybe you could become a writer?
Jane Eyre, which I read when I was about 12. To be so invested in a character.
What's the worst book you've ever read? Should you stick with a bad book?
Oh that's a tricky question and I honestly can't answer it. Even badly written books teach me something – how not to do it, and writerly traps to be wary of.
Is there a book you wish you had written? Why?
So many! Anything by Michael Ondaatje, for his audacity. Anne Carson, for her precision. Cormac McCarthy, for the seduction of his voice. Toni Morrison for her ability to move the reader.
Why do you think Canberra gets such a bad rap?
I don't consider that Canberra gets a bad rap at all. I have too many mates who live there and I am envious of their lovely lives. What I love about it: the smell of eucalyptus, kangaroos on suburban reserves, the lack of traffic jams, great playgrounds for kids, the schools, Questacon, the exhibitions at the National Library.
Why should readers come and see you at the CWF?
To be surprised.
Nikki Gemmell will be speaking at Women's Defining Moments in Australian History at the National Museum of Australia at 5.30pm on Saturday, August 26, and In Conversation with Dr Leah Kaminsky where she will be talking about her latest book, After, at the National Portrait Gallery on Sunday, August 27, at 1pm.
Julia Baird
What was the first story you ever wrote? How old were you?
I can't remember the first story but I remember the first poem – I was seven, living in Canberra and going to a wonderful little school near the Australian War Memorial where I was allowed to write epic poems all afternoon.
What was the first book you read that made you think maybe you could become a writer?
I think Alice Walker's books (all of them). She spoke her truth so bluntly and clearly and unapologetically.
What's the worst book you've ever read? Should you stick with a bad book?
The Truth About Men & Love by my friend Peter Wood (It's ok, I have said this to his face). He is endlessly inventive with synonyms for breasts ... but it was not for me. And no.
Is there a book you wish you had written? Why?
Yes, my next book. It's time to slip into another world, again.
Why do you think Canberra gets such a bad rap?
People who are tough on the city have not spent enough time there. I have always loved Canberra. It is where I started writing as a kid, lying on my back in a park looking at autumn leaves with a teacher who let us scribble for hours without interruption, and it is where I wrote my PhD, in the library with large desks and swans on a lake, and where I wrote much of my book, looking over the trees at University House. I like its wide skies, brisk air and peace.
Why should readers come and see you at the CWF?
Because for me, this is where it began. Because history is the best thing on earth. And because I have lots of juicy stories about Queen Victoria.
Julia Baird is part of the CWF All Stars night, Saturday August 26, 7pm, at the National Museum of Australia, and In Conversation with Angus Trumble, about her latest book, Victoria: The Queen, at the National Library of Australia, on Sunday, August 27, at 3.30pm.
Jack Heath
What was the first story you ever wrote? How old were you?
At nine I remember writing a story called The Afterlife Guard, which was about an immortal police officer who hunted ghosts. I haven't matured much since then.
What was the first book you read that made you think maybe you could become a writer?
At 10 I read several books by local author Jackie French. One of them was called How Aliens from Alpha Centauri Invaded My Maths Class and Turned Me Into a Writer and How You Can Be One Too. I don't remember any of the advice therein, but it seems like it worked!
What's the worst book you've ever read? Should you stick with a bad book?
I'm not sure there's any such thing as a bad book. If anyone at all likes it – and presumably the author and the publisher do, at a minimum – then I'm glad it exists. But there is such thing as a mismatch between book and reader. In year eight at Lyneham High School, my class read a book about eating disorders and divorce. I hated that book so much that it inspired me to start writing my own, which was mostly about robots and kung-fu.
Is there a book you wish you had written? Why?
I just finished reading Black Moon by Kenneth Calhoun. It's about a plague of insomnia which threatens society, slowly driving people mad. It's pretty much the perfect book – convincing, confronting, clever. I found myself thinking, I could practice for a thousand years and never write this well.
Why do you think Canberra gets such a bad rap?
I assume it's just envy. Canberra is beautiful to look at, easy to get around and very cultural. There's nothing worth doing you can't do here. Other than the cold winters, it's perfect. I can't imagine ever leaving.
Why should readers come and see you at the CWF?
I bring the same attitude to my sessions as I do to my books: no boring bits allowed. Plus, all my sessions are free! The book launch for 500 Minutes of Danger – sequel to the best-selling, award-nominated and TV-optioned 300 Minutes of Danger – should be especially exciting.
Jack Heath will launch his latest book 500 Minutes of Danger at the Museum of Australian Democracy on Saturday, August 26, at 11am; is Live! at the National Library of Australia on Saturday, August 26, at 2.30pm and part of Canberra's Big Book Club on Sunday, August 27, at the Museum of Australian Democracy from 1pm.
Graeme Simsion
What was the first story you ever wrote? How old were you?
Can't remember the first. When I was eight, I wrote a story which so impressed my teacher that she sent it to the headmistress. It came back marked in red: "I will not assess any essay that begins with the word I." The Rosie Project begins: "I may have found a solution…"
What was the first book you read that made you think maybe you could become a writer?
Tropic of Cancer. Read like memoir, and at 21 I was enthusiastic about making a start by getting the necessary life experience … Then, in my 40s, I read Joe Queenan's The Unkindest Cut about making a low-budget movie, and thought that if he could do it…
What's the worst book you've ever read? Should you stick with a bad book?
Most bad books can teach us something - especially if we're writers. If one stuck out as "the worst", I'd surely learn something from it: things not to do – and how to make a book stick out! Even books that advance a view I disagree with are interesting to me in terms of crafting characters – why do people think this way? But life's too short to read the whole book once you've discovered that the writing is terrible.
Is there a book you wish you had written? Why?
Gödel Escher Bach by Douglas Hofstadter. Original, well-written, underpinned by a knowledge of maths, music and computing that exceeds mine. Cult classic and a Pulitzer.
Why do you think Canberra gets such a bad rap?
It does? In my previous life running a consultancy, we had an office in Canberra. What I liked most was the people and the exchange of ideas in the service of public good. My most satisfying assignment ever was pro bono in Canberra. What I didn't like was the bureaucracy – and how it encouraged a few people to behave as jerks. The only time we got sued…
Why should readers come and see you at the CWF?
Free chocolates. Also, I love talking to readers and I hope it shows in my presentations. I was a latecomer to writing and I think some Canberra people may enjoy the story of my journey.
Graeme Simsion is In Conversation at the National Library of Australia on Friday, August 24, at 11am; part of My Life in an Object at the National Museum of Australia on Saturday, August 26, at 3.30pm; and appearing with Anne Buist for Two Steps Forward at the National Portrait Gallery on Sunday, August 27, at 2.30pm.
What: The 2017 Canberra Writers Festival
When: August 25-27, 2017
Where: A variety of venues across Canberra
Tickets: On sale now and can be booked online or by calling Ticketek on 132 849
More information: www.canberrawritersfestival.com.au
