Todd Carney was nervous. Returning to his first club for the first time. The club that sacked him more than 10 years ago.
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His one regret was his NRL career didn't start and finish with the Canberra Raiders. The club he grew up in Goulburn wanting to play for.
But the 33-year-old and the Green Machine took the first step towards moving on from their rocky past at the club's Forever Green day last weekend.
Carney was invited along to the old boys' day, where the Raiders celebrated all their past players with a 20-12 win over the Wests Tigers at Canberra Stadium on Saturday.
A weekend they also celebrated the 30th anniversary of the club's maiden premiership.
It's the first time he's been back in the lime-green fold since he was sacked in 2008 after allegedly urinating on a man in a Canberra nightclub.
It ended his fifth NRL season with the Raiders prematurely, after a series of alcohol-related dramas.
Understandably, he was anxious about coming back, but in the end happy he did.
"Before I turned up today, with what went on with the club with me, I was obviously a bit nervous, but it's a club that I've played for," Carney told The Canberra Times.
"Like I've said my whole career, the positives of my career outweighs the negatives.
"What I've done for this club and what the club's done for me has made me what I am today and I'll always owe them that and what I've done for this club they owe me.
"I was a kid from Goulburn who wanted to be a Canberra Raiders junior, a Canberra Raiders legend.
"I was fortunate enough to play for the club. I owe everything to the game of rugby league and this is the first club I stepped foot in.
"Being here today is a step in the right direction to move on from what went on.
"I look back now and think I'm glad I've done it."
Regrets? From a playing point of view, not really.
After he left Canberra, and sat out the 2009 NRL season, he joined the Sydney Roosters, where he enjoyed a stunning 2010 campaign.
Dally M player of the year. International player of the year. Dally M five-eighth of the year. International five-eighth of the year.
Not to mention playing in the grand final. And representing Australia.
It was enough to make Raiders fans weep.
A couple of years later, when he was playing for Cronulla, he also made his State of Origin debut for the NSW Blues.
The one regret was that all didn't happen with the Green Machine.
"Regrets in life is something everyone goes through, but me as a player after I left Canberra I went on to play for Australia, play for NSW and win a Dally M and play in a grand final," Carney said.
"Regrets? Not really. Regrets to leave a club I wanted to play for the rest of my career? Yes.
"But as a player I went on to bigger things, not better things, but definitely with where I'm at in the game at the moment, I'm excited being back here and part of a club I enjoyed."
Being back in the fold meant he could catch-up with good mate and Raiders co-captain Jarrod Croker in the sheds after the game.
It was a moment Carney said he would cherish.
He was one of Croker's groomsmen at his wedding in 2017, after which he approached the club about returning as a player after a stint in the Super League.
But the Raiders board kiboshed the request and he ended up playing in the Queensland Cup instead.
Now he's the captain-coach of Byron Bay and has set up his own rugby league academy, where he's hoping to help the "next Todd Carney" come through.
Just as it was for Carney, having his mate back in the Raiders camp was also a special moment for Croker.
Luckily the football gods conspired to give the Red Devils the weekend off.
"I was quite proud to be honest. He was more excited about getting down here than I was getting him here," Croker said.
"He thought [Byron Bay] were playing on the weekend and they had the bye.
"He asked me on Monday, and I said, 'I'm sure we can work it out mate'. Before I had even got the chance to ring, he rang.
"He was excited to come down. As a mate, it's very pleasing to see guys like him and Joey Picker, two of my really good mates over the years, it was nice to see them back and see them enjoy the weekend."
As well as rebuilding bridges, playing footy and teaching the next gen, Carney's also been busy writing a book.
Hard Truth is a reflection on his career and comes out next month.
"The book's the book ... what happened in my career - negative I speak about, positive I speak about," Carney said.
"There's no juicy stuff because at the end of the day the juicy stuff brings in people you played alongside.
"I speak about what I did wrong and what I did right. If that's what people want to read, I'm happy for it."
NRL ROUND 19
Sunday: Penrith Panthers v Canberra Raiders at Panthers Stadium, 4.05pm.
Raiders squad: 1. Charnze Nicoll-Klokstad, 2. Bailey Simonsson, 3. Jarrod Croker (c), 4. Michael Oldfield, 5. Jordan Rapana, 6. Jack Wighton, 7. Aidan Sezer, 8. Josh Papalii, 9. Josh Hodgson (c), 10. Sia Soliola, 11. John Bateman, 12. Elliott Whitehead, 13. Joe Tapine. Interchange: 14. Siliva Havili, 15. Emre Guler, 16. Corey Horsburgh, 17. Dunamis Lui, 18. Sam Williams, 19. Royce Hunt, 20. Sebastian Kris, 21. JJ Collins.
Panthers squad: 1. Dylan Edwards, 2. Josh Mansour, 3. Dean Whare, 4. Brent Naden, 5. Brian To'o, 6. James Maloney, 7. Nathan Cleary, 8. James Tamou, 9. Mitchell Kenny, 10. James Fisher-Harris, 11, Viliame Kikau, 12. Frank Winterstein, 13. Isaah Yeo. Interchange: 14. Wayden Egan, 15. Jahrome Luai, 16. Moses Leota, 17. Reagan Campbell-Gillard, 18. Jed Cartwright, 19. Spencer Leniu, 20. Stephen Crichton, 21. Liam Martin.