'It has just gone like that': 20 years on from the Bali bombings

Terrorists callously detonated three bombs in the tourist playground of Kuta on October 12, 2002, killing 202 people including 88 Australians and severely wounding hundreds more.

Nevertheless, the past 20 years has been a blink of the eye to Bali bombings survivor Brad "Rooster" Phillips who came to Parliament House in Canberra on Wednesday for a commemorative service to remember and console.

"It has just gone like that. It takes something I suppose so devastating to reflect each year and you realise how quickly life is," he said with his 15 year old son Ashton by his side.

"I think the first five years is a bit of a blur. But after that, it just seems to have gone so, so quickly. It just feels like it was even five years ago. That's how quickly it goes."

He was one of 13 Kingsley Cats football club team members from Perth who survived the initial attack at the Sari Club. Seven young men from that team lost their lives as they were celebrating on an end-of-season trip. Two other team mates Laurie Kerr and Adam Nimmo have died far too young in recent years.

"So I lost my best friend over in Bali and then my best friend since Bali," he said with a tremor in his voice.

"It has been a really rough ride for sure."

Mr Phillips is now 50 years old and admits to being in some dark places over the years. He brought his son to Canberra on his first trip out of Perth. It is a reminder that night back in 2002 when Islamic terrorism struck was a first overseas trip for many.

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Detective Inspector Mark Laird recounts speaking with a terrified 18-year-old teammate of Mr Phillips in his hotel room, worried that the terrorists were going to track him down and get him.

"I said no mate. They are not going to come back and get you. I will make sure of that," he recounts.

"If you are scared you can come and stay at the hotel down the road. There are four police. He chose to stay with his teammates."

He is still in contact with that survivor to this day.

The Foreign Minister Penny Wong led proceedings reflecting back on that "moment of cold savagery" and pointing to what was evident: That pain remains, "even after all this time".

But she stated that "ultimately, the terrorists failed" because they did not change Australians and they did not divide Australia and Indonesia.

John Howard, who was the prime minister at the time of the attacks, spoke - off the cuff as is his custom - of the "brutal, villainous murder" and of the responders and consular staff who "did Australia proud".

"I think the most lasting monument to the folly as well as the evil of those who murdered our 88 fellow Australians is the fact that their goal included driving a wedge between Australia and Indonesia. And that failed," he said.

Dr Siswo Pramono, the Indonesian Ambassador to Australia, stepped up to describe the bombings as a "hideous crime" and "one of the saddest days in Indonesian history".

"Indonesia and Australia are not just neighbours, but most importantly, we are also partners," he said.

"With the rich history of relations between Indonesia and Australia, I'm certain that we can prevail over any challenge that might come, especially terrorism."

Detective Inspector Laird, who announced on Wednesday that he was retiring after 35 years service, spoke at the Canberra service out of uniform on behalf of the thousands of Bali bombing responders around the world.

"Quite frankly it was overwhelming. And I simply did not know how we were going to manage what we were confronted with. So we did what responders do. We got to work," he said.

Then there was a rare thing at a memorial service: Applause.